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Humor Have some funny jokes or stories? All is fair game except political, religious or too explicit.

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Old 08-18-2014, 09:02 PM   #1
dahawk
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Default Retiree Mental Fitness Evaluation

Retiree Mental Fitness Evaluation


I got one right !

This test is to ascertain your mental state now. If you get one right you are
doing ok, if you get none right you better go for counseling. (I'll meet you there.)
There are 4 test questions. Donít miss one.

Giraffe Test






1. How do you put a giraffe into a refrigerator?Stop and think about it and decide on your answer before you scroll down.

















The correct answer: Open the refrigerator, put in the giraffe, and close the door. This question tests whether you tend to do simple things in an overly complicated way.


Elephant Test








2. How do you put an elephant into a refrigerator?


















Did you say, Open the refrigerator, put in the elephant, and close the refrigerator? Wrong Answer.


Correct Answer: Open the refrigerator, take out the giraffe, put in the elephant and close the door. This tests your ability to think through the repercussions of your previous actions.


Lion King Test








3. The Lion King is hosting an Animal Conference. All the animals attend ... except one. Which animal does not attend?






















Correct Answer: The Elephant. The elephant is in the refrigerator. You just put him in there. This tests your memory.










Okay, even if you did not answer the first three questions correctly, you still have one more chance to show your true abilities.

Crocodile Test

4. There is a river you must cross but it is used by crocodiles, and you do not have a boat. How do you manage it?



























Correct Answer: You jump into the river and swim across. Havenít you
been lis-ten-ing? All the crocodiles are attending the Animal Conference. This tests whether you learn quickly from your mistakes.





According to Anderson Consulting Worldwide, around 90% of the Retirees they tested got all questions wrong, but many preschoolers got several correct answers. Anderson Consulting says this conclusively proves the theory that most Retirees do not have the brains of a four-year-old.


- Hawk




















































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Old 08-18-2014, 09:46 PM   #2
Heli Jim
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I got three right..won't tell which I missed, though

Helicopters don't really fly.......
They're just so ugly, that the earth repels them.
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Old 08-18-2014, 10:10 PM   #3
fhhuber
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Someone has an awfully big refrigerator...



**********

How do you eat an elephant?
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One bite at a time.
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Old 08-19-2014, 02:01 AM   #4
firemanbill
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I think this shows I should be retired!

2012 SEFF Night Bowling Champion!
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Old 08-22-2014, 05:53 PM   #5
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Originally Posted by Heli Jim View Post
I got three right..won't tell which I missed, though

Me too but in my case I thought I could use a helicopter to cross the river
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Old 10-17-2014, 05:19 PM   #6
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I'd take the Elephant out and put beer and pizza in instead.
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Old 10-17-2014, 05:38 PM   #7
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1. How do you put a giraffe into a refrigerator?

You chop him up into steaks and stack them. (beside the bacon)

2. How do you put an elephant into a refrigerator?

You chop him up into roasts and stack them beside the giraffe meat.

3. The Lion King is hosting an Animal Conference. All the animals attend ... except one. Which animal does not attend?


2 are missing... the giraffe and the elephant are awaiting my barbecue getting hot.

4. There is a river you must cross but it is used by crocodiles, and you do not have a boat. How do you manage it?

Toss out elephant roasts. While the crocodiles are eating those its perfectly safe.

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Old 10-17-2014, 06:33 PM   #8
Wildflyer
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4. There is a river you must cross but it is used by crocodiles, and you do not have a boat. How do you manage it?

Use the bridge. This tests your ability to observe things around you.

Dave R, Proud PGR rider.
When you have flying skills like mine,
You become a master at repair.
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