Wattflyer RC Network: RC Universe :: RCU Magazine :: RCU Forums :: RCU Classifieds :: RCU User Reviews :: RCU YouTube
Home Who's Online Calendar Today's Posts RealTime Post Spy Mark Forums Read
Go Back   WattFlyer RC Electric Flight Forums - Discuss radio control eflight > R/C Electric Topics - General > Humor
Register Members List Wattflyer Extras Articles Search Today's Posts Mark Forums Read Social Groups

Humor Have some funny jokes or stories? All is fair game except political, religious or too explicit.

Thank you for your support (hide ads)
Reply
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
Old 06-12-2013, 01:09 AM   #1
Don Sims
Administrator
 
Don Sims's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2005
Location: Near Dyer, TN
Posts: 10,484
View Don Sims's Gallery5
Thanked 347 Times in 337 Posts
Awards Showcase

WAA-08 Pilot  Globetrotter Pilot 
iTrader: (3)
Friends: (39)
Post A little LEO humor...

Southern cops have a way with words! These are actual comments made by South Carolina Troopers that were taken off their car videos:

1. "You know, stop lights don't come any redder than the one you just went through."
2. "Relax, the handcuffs are tight because they're new. They'll stretch after you wear them a while."
3. "If you take your hands off the car, I'll make your birth certificate a worthless document."
4. "If you run, you'll only go to jail tired."
5. "Can you run faster than 1200 feet per second? Yes or no; because that's the speed of the bullet that'll be chasing you."
6. "You don't know how fast you were going? I guess that means I can write anything I want to on the ticket, huh?"
7. "Yes, sir, you can talk to the shift supervisor, but I don't think it will help. Oh, did I mention that I'm the shift supervisor?"
8. "Warning! You want a warning? O.K, I'm warning you not to do that again or I'll give you another ticket."
9. "The answer to this last question will determine whether you are drunk or not. Was Mickey Mouse a cat or a dog?"
10. "Fair? You want me to be fair? Listen, fair is a place where you go to ride on rides, eat cotton candy and corn dogs and step in monkey poop."
11. "Yeah, we have a quota. Two more tickets and my wife gets a toaster oven."
12. "In God we trust; all others we run through NCIC." (National Crime Information Center )
13. "Just how big were those 'two beers' you say you had?"
14. "No sir, we don't have quotas anymore. We used to, but now we're allowed to write as many tickets as we can."
15. "I'm glad to hear that the Chief (of Police) is a personal friend of yours. So you know someone who can post your bail."

AND THE WINNER IS....

16. "You didn't think we give pretty women tickets? You're right, we don't. Sign here."

Take care and thanks for posting at WattFlyer!!

Don
Don Sims is offline  
  Reply With Quote
Old 06-12-2013, 11:50 AM   #2
CHELLIE
Super Contributor
 
CHELLIE's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2006
Location: Hesperia, So. Calif
Posts: 18,732
View CHELLIE's Gallery13
Thanked 2,190 Times in 2,096 Posts
Club: Chino Renegades RC Flying Club
Awards Showcase

Scratchbuilders Award  Scratchbuilders Award  Ambassador Award  100mph Speed Demon 
iTrader: (4)
Friends: (317)
Default

Good One Don LOL

I may be getting Older, But I Refuse to grow Up I am Having to much Fun to Grow Up LOL
CHELLIE is offline  
  Reply With Quote
Old 06-12-2013, 05:39 PM   #3
CNY_Dave
Member
 
Join Date: Aug 2011
Location: near Cortland NY
Posts: 774
Thanked 36 Times in 35 Posts
iTrader: (0)
Friends: (1)
Default

To me:

"You feeling froggy, boy? 'Cause if you want to jump, go ahead, jump!"
(NY Dutchess County sheriff, we had a thing going where he'd harass me and I'd do huge burnouts just outside his field of vision)

"Do you always drive around with an empty film container?"
(I point to my camera) "Only when I drive around with my camera"
(NY state trooper while stopped on I84 on the newburgh-beacon bridge)

"Do you mind if we use your car as part of a training stop?"
(NY statie pulled me over in my '67 GTO just because they figured it'd make a good car search exercise for the rookie)
\
"You've been drinking, I can smell it"
(bored NY townie at 3am, rt. 9G north of roseton, it was fall and the fallen apples in the orchards were rotting and fermenting)



My friend to a statie, squaring off across the trunk of my '67 GTO:
"Why are you such a pain in our ass, is it because you're mad at the world because god made you short and ugly?!"

Cop, to me: "GET BACK IN THE CAR!"

Me: "I just want to watch you hit him"

Ask me why your DX5e is doomed... and how to fix it.
CNY_Dave is offline  
  Reply With Quote
Old 06-12-2013, 08:56 PM   #4
toddyrotten
Member
 
toddyrotten's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2013
Location: Rochester, New York
Posts: 52
Thanked 4 Times in 3 Posts
iTrader: (0)
Friends: (0)
Default

Was "Arrested" once for illegal possession of fireworks. When I asked the trooper if it was a misdemeanor or a felony, he told me "Neither. It's an annoyance charge. You annoy me and I annoy you." It was on July 4th too. How un-patriotic!
toddyrotten is offline  
  Reply With Quote
Reply

  WattFlyer RC Electric Flight Forums - Discuss radio control eflight > R/C Electric Topics - General > Humor

« Previous Thread | Next Thread »

Currently Active Users Viewing This Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
 
Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off

Forum Jump

Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
Morning humor Old Fart Humor 1 03-01-2013 01:30 AM
I Love Humor CHELLIE Humor 7 03-18-2011 04:22 AM


All times are GMT +1. The time now is 06:20 PM.


Powered by: vBulletin
Copyright ©2000 - 2014, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
Copyright 2005 WattfFlyer.com
RCU Eflight HQ

Charities we support Select: Yorkie Rescue  ::  Crohn's & Colitis Foundation



Page generated in 0.17389 seconds with 25 queries