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Humor Have some funny jokes or stories? All is fair game except political, religious or too explicit.

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Old 08-07-2014, 01:14 PM   #1
dahawk
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Default This is your Captain Speaking

A plane was taking off from Kennedy Airport. After it reached a comfortable cruising altitude, the captain made an announcement over the intercom, “Ladies and Gentlemen, this is your captain speaking. Welcome to flight #293, nonstop from New York to Los Angeles. The weather ahead is good and therefore we should have a smooth and uneventful flight. So set back and relax – OH MY GOD!”

Silence followed and after a few minutes, the captain came back on the intercom and said, “Ladies and Gentlemen, I am so sorry if I scared you earlier, but while I was talking the flight attendant brought me a cup of coffee and spilled the hot coffee in my lap. You should see the front of my pants.”

A passenger in coach said, “THAT’S NOTHING. He should see the back of mine.”


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Old 08-07-2014, 05:12 PM   #2
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Good one!
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Old 08-07-2014, 11:55 PM   #3
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Take care and thanks for posting at WattFlyer!!

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Old 08-09-2014, 05:55 AM   #4
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BA 747 takes of from Heathrow bound for destinations afar ...

Ding Dong ... This is your Captain speaking .. welcome aboard this British Airways 747 bound for Hong Kong ... our cabin services staff will be happy to look after you and now please sit back, enjoy the flight .....

Forgets to switch of intercom ...

Hey First ... that blonde hostess down in economy - the new lass ... what a peach ... once we land - I'm gonna have a Sh**, Shower, shave and **** the pants of her ...

The blonde of note runs up the aisle to let them know intercoms on ... little old lady puts her foot out ... trips her up ... to the words ..........

Lassie - take it easy - we haven't landed ... and he hasn't had his sh**, shower or shave yet !!

Nigel

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