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Humor Have some funny jokes or stories? All is fair game except political, religious or too explicit.

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Old 10-21-2005, 11:22 PM   #1
Don Sims
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Angry Beware of a bitter wife

I may have posted this on another site, if so, balme it on the old age...

THE CURTAIN RODS

She spent the first day packing her belongings into boxes, crates and suitcases.

On the second day, she had the removalists come and collect her things.

On the third day, she sat down for the last time at their beautiful dining room table by candlelight, put on some soft background music, and had a last supper of a kilo of prawns, a jar of caviar, and a bottle of Verdelho.

When she had finished, she went into each and every room and deposited a few half-eaten prawn shells, dipped in caviar, into the hollow of the curtain rods.

She then cleaned up the kitchen and left her home.

When the husband returned with his new girlfriend, all was bliss for the first few days.

Then slowly, the house began to smell. They tried everything; cleaning and mopping and airing the place out. Vents were checked for dead rats, and carpets were steam-cleaned. Air fresheners were hung everywhere.

Exterminators were brought in to set off gas canisters, during which they had to move out for a few days, and in the end they even paid to replace the expensive wool carpeting.

Nothing worked.

People stopped coming over to visit...

Repairmen refused to work in the house...

The maid quit...

Finally, they could not take the stench any longer and decided to move.

A month later, even though they had cut their price in half, they could not find a buyer for their stinky house. Word got out, and eventually, even the local realtors refused to return their calls.

Finally, they had to borrow a huge sum of money from the bank to purchase a new place.

The ex-wife called the man, and asked how things were going.

He told her the saga of the rotting house.

She listened politely, and said that she missed her old home terribly, and she would be willing to reduce her divorce settlement in exchange for getting the house back...

Knowing his ex-wife had no idea how bad the smell was, he agreed on a price that was about 1/10th of what the house had been worth...But only if she were to sign the papers that very day.

She agreed, and within the hour, his lawyers delivered the paperwork.

A week later, the man and his new girlfriend stood smirking as they watched the moving company pack everything to take to their new home........including the curtain rods.



I LOVE A HAPPY ENDING, DON'T YOU
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Old 10-22-2005, 11:29 AM   #2
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That is great. Rings like a true story.

Debbie Hicks AMA# 8601 Leader Member - Industrial
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Old 10-22-2005, 04:33 PM   #3
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Haha funny,Shows you not to cheat on your wife.

"I'ld rather be flying"

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best friends."

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Old 10-22-2005, 09:03 PM   #4
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Originally Posted by debhicks View Post
That is great. Rings like a true story.
Is this something that maybe Will should read?

"When they outlaw RC Planes, only US outlaws will still fly RC Planes..."

FAA# OUTLAW! (I don't own a Drone!"
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Old 10-22-2005, 10:03 PM   #5
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I read it to him this morning. I don't keep toooooo many secrets. Unless it's Christmas

Debbie Hicks AMA# 8601 Leader Member - Industrial
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Old 10-24-2005, 10:11 PM   #6
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Thats just wrong man.

Bigger Badder Meaner Faster
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Old 10-24-2005, 11:07 PM   #7
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Originally Posted by Don07tncav View Post
I may have posted this on another site, if so, balme it on the old age...

THE CURTAIN RODS

I LOVE A HAPPY ENDING, DON'T YOU
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